507. The Old Priest Matan (or Natan).

 507. The Old Priest Matan (or Natan). 8th October 1946. 1 When Peter enters the house, he has the same depressed gesture as he had at the Jordan after wading at Bethabara: as if he were exhausted he throws himself 507. The Old Priest Matan (or Natan). 355 onto the first seat he finds, and holds his head in his hands. The others are not so dejected, but they are all more or less upset, pale looking, I would say bewildered. The sons of Alphaeus, James of Zebedee and Andrew hardly reply to the greetings of Joseph of Sephoris and of his wife, who arrives with an old maidservant and some new bread still warm and various foodstuffs. There are traces of tears on Marjiam's cheeks. Isaac rushes towards Jesus, takes His hand and caressing it he whispers: « It is always like the night of the slaughter... And You are safe once again. Oh! my Lord, for how long? For how long will You be able to save Yourself?» His words make the others talkative and they all begin to speak, although confusedly, telling of the ill-treatments, threats and fear they suffered... 2 There is another knock at the door. « Alas, have they followed us?! I said that it was wise to come few at a time!...» says the Iscariot. « Yes, it would have been better. They are shadowing us all the time. But now...» says Bartholomew. Joseph himself, although somewhat reluctantly, goes to look at the peep-hole, while his wife says: « From the terrace you can descend to the stables and thence into the rear kitchen garden. I will show you...» But while she sets out, her husband exclaims: « Joseph the Elder! What an honour!» and he opens the door letting in Joseph of Arimathea. « Peace to You, Master. I was there and I saw... Manaen met me while I was coming out of the Temple disgusted to death, as I was not able to intervene, to do anything, in order to be more useful to You, and... Oh! you are here as well, Judas of Kerioth? You could do it, since you are the friend of so many! Do you not feel it is your duty, as you are His apostle?» « You are a disciple...» « No. If I were, I would follow Him like many others. I am a friend of His.» « It's the same thing.» « No. Lazarus also is His friend, but you are not going to tell me that he is a disciple...» « He is, in his soul.» « All those who are not demons are disciples of His word, because they realise that it is the word of Wisdom.» The petty quarrel between Joseph and Judas of Kerioth comes to an end as Joseph of Sephoris, who only now realises that something unpleasant has taken place, questions this one and that one with interest and some sorrow. « Joseph of Alphaeus must be told! He must be told. And I will entrust... What do you want of me, Joseph?» he asks addressing the Elder who has touched his shoulder as if he wanted to ask him something. « Nothing. I only wanted to congratulate you on your healthy look. This is a good Israelite: faithful and just in everything. Eh! I know. We can say of him that God has tested and known him...» Another knock at the door. The two Josephs go together towards the door to open it and I see Joseph of Arimathea bend to say something in the ear of the other one, who reacts with great surprise and turns round for a moment to look at the apostles. He then opens the door. 3 Nicodemus and Manaen come in followed by all the shepherd disciples present in Jerusalem, that is, Jonathan and the exdisciples of the Baptist. Then, with them, there is John, the priest, with another very old man and Nicolaus. And, in the rear, Nike with the young girl entrusted to her by Jesus, and Annaleah with her mother. They remove the veils covering their faces, which look upset. « Master! What is happening? I heard... From people first and then from Manaen... The town is full of this rumour, like a buzzing beehive and those who love You are rushing about looking for You wherever they think You may be. They have certainly come to your house as well, Joseph... I was going to Lazarus' house, too... It's too much! How did You manage to get out of trouble?» « Providence watched over Me. The women disciples should not weep but they ought to bless the Eternal Father and fortify their hearts. And thanks and blessings to all of you. Love and justice are not completely dead in Israel. And that consoles Me.» « Yes, Master, but do not go to the Temple any more. Stay away for a long time, and don't go there!» They all agree in repeating the words and the anxious « don't go » re-echoes among the robust walls of the old house in voices of imploring warning. Little Martial, hidden goodness knows where, hears the noise and rushes  towards the room out of curiosity, and peeps through the aperture of the curtains. He sees Mary and goes towards her taking shelter in her arms for fear of being reproached by Joseph of Sephoris. But Joseph is too excited and busy listening to this one and that one, giving advice and approving, and so forth, to pay attention to him, and he notices him only when the boy, to whom old Mary has said something, goes to Jesus and kisses Him throwing his arms round His neck. Jesus embraces him with one arm, drawing him towards Himself, while He replies to the many people who are telling Him what they think is best to do. « No. I am not moving from here. You may go to Lazarus, who was waiting for Me, and tell him that I cannot go. I, a Galilean and a friend of the family for years, am staying here until tomorrow evening. Then I will decide where to go...» « You always say so, then You go back there, but we will not let You go back again. At least I will not. I really thought You were doomed...» says Peter while two tears well in his bulging eyes. 4 « I have never seen the like. And it's enough. I have made up my mind. If You do not reject me... I am too old for the altar, by now, but I am still strong enough to die for You. And I will die, if necessary, between the sanctuary and the altar, like wise Zechariah, or Onias the defensor of the Temple and of the Treasury, I will die outside the sacred enclosure to which I have devoted all my life. But You will open a holier place to me! Oh! I can no longer bear the abomination! Why did my eyes have to see so much? The abomination seen by the Prophet is already within the walls and it is rising and rising like the impetuous water of a flood on the point of submerging a town! It is rising and rising, invading courts and porches, overflowing steps, advancing further and further! It is rising and is already about to strike against the Holy of Holies! The muddy water is already lapping on the stones paving the holy place! Their precious hues are darkened! The feet of the Priest are soiled with it! His tunic is soaked with it! And the Ephod is made dirty! The stones of the Rational are dimmed by it and its words can no longer be read! Oh! The waves of the abomination are rising to the face of the High Priest and soiling it, and the Holiness of the Lord is under a crust of mud and his tiara is like a piece of cloth which has fallen into a muddy pond. Mud! Mud! But is it rising from outside, or from the top of Moria is it flowing over the town and all over Israel? Father Abraham! Father Abraham! Did you not want to light the fire of the sacrifice there, so that the holocaust of your faithful heart might shine brightly? Slush now gurgles where the fire was to be! Isaac is among us, and the people are immolating him. But if the Victim is pure... if the Victim is pure... the sacrificers are filthy. Anathema on us! On the mountain the Lord will see the abomination of His people!... Ah!» and the old man who is with John, the priest, drops on the ground covering his face and weeping desolately. « I brought him to You... He has been wishing for that for such a long time... But today, after what he saw, no one could hold him any longer... Old Matan (or Natan) is often inspired with prophetic spirit, and if his eyesight is becoming dimmer and dimmer, his spiritual vision is becoming brighter and brighter. Accept my friend, Lord » says John, the priest. « I do not reject anybody. Stand up, priest, and raise your spirit. High above there is no mud, and he who knows how to stay high above is not touched by mud.» The old man before getting up, full of veneration, takes the lowest hem of Jesus' tunic and kisses it. 5 The women, and Annaleah in particular, are weeping under their veils, still deeply moved and the words of the old man increase their weeping. Jesus calls them, and with lowered heads they come near Him from the corner where they were staying. If Nike and Annaleah's mother are successful in controlling their tears, concealing them almost completely, the young woman disciple is sobbing loudly, heedless of those who are watching her with different feelings. « Forgive her, Master. She owes her life to You and she loves You. It is impossible for her to believe that they can harm You. And then she has been left so... lonely and so... sad after...» says her mother. « Oh! it is not that! No, it is not that! Lord! Master! My Saviour! I... I...» Annaleah is unable to speak, partly because of her sobbing, partly out of shame or something else. « She was afraid of reprisals because she is a disciple. That is certainly the reason. Many are going away because of that...» says the Iscariot. 507. The Old Priest Matan (or Natan). 357 « Oh! no! Even less so! Man, you do not understand anything, or you lend your thoughts to other people. But You know, Lord, why I am weeping. I was afraid that You were dead and that You had forgotten the promise...» she says, ending with a sigh, after uttering the first words vigorously, rebelling against Judas' insinuation. Jesus replies to her: « I never forget. Be not afraid. Go home, in peace, awaiting the hour of My triumph and of your peace. Go. The sun is about to set. Withdraw, women. And may peace be with you.» « Lord, I am not happy to leave You...» says Nike. « Obedience is love.» « True, Master. But why can I not follow You like Eliza?» « Because you are as useful to Me here as she is at Nob. Go, Nike. Let some men escort the women so that no one may importune them.» 6 Manaen and Jonathan are ready to obey, but Jesus stops Jonathan asking him: « So, are you going back to Galilee?» « Yes, Master, the day after the Sabbath. My master is sending me.» « Have you room in the wagon?» « I am by myself, Master.» « Then you will take Marjiam and Isaac with you. You, Isaac, know what you have to do. And you, too, Marjiam...» « Yes, Master » reply the two, Isaac with his mild smile, Marjiam with a tremor of tears in his voice and on his lips. Jesus caresses him, and Marjiam, forgetting all reservedness, throws himself on His chest saying: « Leave You... now that everybody is persecuting You!... Oh! my Master! I shall never see You again!... You have been all my Good. I found everything in You!... Why are You sending me away? Let me die with You! Of what importance is life to me, if I do not have You?» « I say to you what I said to Nike. Obedience is love.» « I will go! Bless me, Jesus!» Jonathan goes away with Manaen, Nike and the other three women. Also the other disciples go away in small groups. Only when the room, previously overcrowded, is almost empty, the absence of Judas of Kerioth is noticed. And many are surprised, because he was there shortly before, and he has not been given any order. « He must have gone to do some shopping for us » says Jesus to prevent comments, and He continues to speak to Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus, the only ones left besides the eleven apostles and Marjiam, who is close to Jesus, anxious to enjoy His company during these last hours. Jesus is thus between Marjiam, an adolescent, and Martial, a boy, both swarthy, lean, equally unhappy in their youth, and equally accepted by two good Israelites in Jesus' name. Joseph of Sephoris and his wife have prudently withdrawn to leave the Master free. 7 Nicodemus asks: « But who is this boy?» « He is Martial. A boy that Joseph has taken as son.» « I did not know.» « No one, or almost no one, knows.» « He is a very humble man. Anybody else would have made his gesture known » remarks Joseph. « Do you think so?... Go, Martial. Take Marjiam to see the house...» says Jesus. And when the two have gone, He resumes speaking: « You are mistaken, Joseph. How difficult it is to judge according to justice!» « But, Lord! To take in an orphan, because he is certainly an orphan, and not boast about it, is surely humility.» « The boy, his name tells you, is not from Israel...» « Ah! now I see. He does the right thing then in keeping him hidden.» « But he has been circumcised...» « It does not matter. You know... Also John of Endor was... But he was the 507. The Old Priest Matan (or Natan). 358 cause of reproach for You. Joseph, a Galilean in addition, might have trouble, despite the circumcision. There are so many orphans in Israel as well... Certainly with that name... and his features...» « How “Israel”.-minded you all are, even the best! Even in doing good deeds you do not understand and you are not able to be perfect! Do you not yet understand that One Only is the Father of Heaven, and that each creature is His child? Do you not yet understand that man can have only one reward and only one punishment and that it is really a reward or a punishment? Why become slaves to the fear of men? But that is the fruit of the corruption of the divine Law, which has been altered and oppressed to such an extent by petty human laws, as to dull and obscure even the thought of the just people who practise it. In the Mosaic Law, therefore divine, in the pre-Mosaic law, merely moral or risen through celestial inspiration, is it perhaps stated that those who did not belong to Israel, could not become part of it? Do we not read in Genesis: “When they are eight days old all your male children must be circumcised, no matter whether they be born within the household or bought from a foreigner not one of your descendants”.? That was stated. Any further addition is your own. I told Joseph and I am telling you. The ancient circumcision will soon no longer have much importance. A new and truer one will replace it and on a nobler part. But while the first one lasts and you, out of loyalty to the Lord, apply it to males born of you or adopted by you, do not be ashamed of having done it also on the flesh of other races. The flesh belongs to the sepulchre, the soul to God. The flesh is circumcised because it is not possible to circumcise what is spiritual. But the holy sign shines on the spirit. And the spirit comes from the Father of all men. Meditate on that.» 8 There is silence, then Joseph of Arimathea stands up and says: « I am going, Master. Come to my house tomorrow.» « No, it is better if I do not come.» « Then come to me, to the house on the Mount of Olives, on the road to Bethany. There is peace and...» « No, not even there. I will go to the Mount of Olives, to pray... But My spirit is seeking solitude. Please excuse Me.» « As You wish, Master. But... do not go to the Temple. Peace to You.» « Peace to you.» The two go away... « I would like to know where Judas has gone!» exclaims James of Zebedee. « I would say to the poor people. But his purse is here.» « Do not worry... He will come...» Mary of Joseph comes in with some lamps, as the light no longer shines through a thick sheet of mica placed as skylight in the large room, and also the two boys come back in. « I am glad to leave You with one whose name is almost like mine. So, when You call him, You will remember me » says Marjiam. Jesus draws him to Himself. Judas also come in. The maidservant opened the door to him. He is bold, smiling, frank! « Master, I wanted to see... The storm has calmed down. And I escorted the women... That virgin is so fearful! I did not say anything to You because You would have stopped me, and I wanted to see whether there was any danger for You. But no one thinks any more about it. The streets are empty on Sabbaths.» « Very well. Let us stay in peace here now and tomorrow...» « You are not going back to the Temple already!» shout the apostles. « No. To our synagogue, as good Galilean believers.»

506. In Joseph's House at Sephoris. Little Martial Named Manasseh.

 506. In Joseph's House at Sephoris. Little Martial Named Manasseh. 7th October 1946. 1 The house of Joseph is not the house of Joseph of Arimathea, but that of an old Galilean of Sephoris, a friend of Alphaeus' sons, particularly of the older ones, as he was a friend, and perhaps a distant relative of old Alphaeus, now dead. And, if I am not mistaken, he has business dealings with the sons of Zebedee for the dried fish trade, as the fish is imported from the lake of Gennesaret to the capital with other products of Galilee, dear to the Galileans who have emigrated to Jerusalem. That is what I gather from the conversation of Alphaeus' two sons and John with Thomas. Jesus instead is a little behind with Manaen, to whom He entrusts the task of going to Joseph of Arimathea and to Nicodemus asking them to call on Him. This Manaen does at once. Jesus joins the three apostles again for a moment, exhorting them once again to be prudent when speaking « for the sake of the levite who has saved them », then He parts from them and strides away towards a little path... 2 But John soon joins Him. « Why have you come?» « We could not leave You all alone... so I came.» « And do you think that you could defend Me by yourself against so many?» « I am not sure. But at least I would die before You. And I would be satisfied.» « You will die a long time after Me, John. But do not regret it. If the Most High leaves you in the world, He does so that you may serve Him and His Word.» « And after...» « After you will continue to serve. As long as you should live to serve Me as both our hearts would wish. But you will serve Me also after your death.» « How shall I do that, my Master? If I am in Heaven with You, I will worship You. I shall not be able to serve You on the Earth after I have departed from it...» « Do you really think so? Well, I tell you that you will serve Me until My new advent, the final one. Many things will dry up before the last times, just as rivers dry up, and from blue wholesome flowing water-courses they become dusty mould and arid stones. But you will still be a river resounding My word and reflecting My light. You will be the supreme light left to remind people of Christ. Because you will be a completely spiritual light and in the last times there will be a struggle of darkness against light, of the flesh against the spirit. Those who persevere in faith, will find strength, hope and comfort in what you have left after you, and which will still be you... and above all will still be Me, because you and I love each other, and where you are I am, and where I am you are. I promised Peter that My Church, which will have My Stone as its head and foundation, will not be demolished by the repeated and fiercer and fiercer assaults of Hell, but now I tell you that what will still be I, and that you will leave as light for those seeking the Light, will not be destroyed, notwithstanding that Hell will try to annihilate it in every way. Nay: even more! Also those who believe in Me in an imperfect manner, because although they accept Me they will not accept My Peter, will always turn to your lighthouse like boats without pilots and without compass, which steer in their storms towards a light, because light means also salvation.» « But what shall I leave, my Lord? I am... poor... ignorant... I have but love...» « There you are: you will leave love. And the love for your Jesus will be word. And many, also among those who will not belong to My Church, who will not belong to any church, but will seek light and comfort as incentives to their unsatisfied spirits, for need of compassion in their grief, will come to you and will find Me.» « I wish the first to find You were these cruel Judaeans, these Pharisees and scribes... But I am not of so much use...» « Nothing can be added to a full vessel. But do not be discouraged... 3 But here we are at Joseph's. Knock and let us go in.» It is a narrow tall house, with a low storehouse on one side, ranksmelling with stacked goods; and beside the latter there is a yard which is dark because of the wall dominating it and looks almost like an inn, as inns were in those days: porticoes for goods, stables for donkeys, small rooms or dormitories for guests. Here there is a badly paved yard, a basin, two low dark stables, a rustic roofing as portico attached to the house and with a rough door opening into the storehouse. And beyond it, the house I have mentioned, old and dark, with a 506. In Joseph's House at Sephoris. Little Martial Named Manasseh. 352 narrow tall door which opens onto three stone steps worn by use. John knocks at the door and waits until a peep-hole is opened and the wrinkled face of an old woman looks through it in the dim light: « Oh! John! I'll open at once. God be with you » utters the mouth in the wrinkled face, and the door is opened with the loud noise of bolts. « I am not alone, Mary. The Master is with me.» « Peace also to Him, the honour of Galilee, and happy is the day bringing the feet of the Holy One to the house of a true Israelite. Come in, Lord. I am going to inform Joseph at once. He is making the last deliveries because the sun sets early in the sad month of Ethanim.» « Leave him to his work, woman. We are stopping here until tomorrow.» « A great joy for us. We have been waiting for You for a long time. And also a few days ago Your brother Joseph sent for news of You. But my husband will give You better information. Now, You can stay here... And I will leave You, Lord, because I am finishing baking the bread. It must be baked before sunset. If there is anything You need, John knows where to find me.» « Go in peace. We do not need anything except hospitality.» 4 They remain alone for some time. Then a little swarthy face appears from behind the curtain separating the room from a corridor and casts sidelong glances, fearful and curious at the same time. « Who is that boy?» Jesus asks John. « I don't know, Lord. He was not here on previous occasions. It is true that since I have been with You, I have never come here on my father's business. Come here, child.» The boy comes forward with short steps. « Who are you?» « I am not telling you.» « Why?» « I don't want to hear bad words said to me. If you say them, I will answer back, and Joseph does not want that.» « That's something new! Master, what do You think of that?» and John laughs, amused as he is with the reasons of the little fellow. Jesus also smiles and lifts His hand to draw the child to Himself and watches him. He then says: « And do you know who I am?» « Yes, I know! You are the Messiah, Who will conquer all the world, then no bad words will be spoken to children like me.» « You are not from Israel, are you?» « I am circumcised... and it was very painful. But... but hunger also was painful and... and not to have mummy any more... and nobody... But it hurts also to hear that one... that we...» he weeps having lost his primitive self-confidence. « He must be a foreign orphan, John. Joseph must have accepted him out of pity and had him circumcised...» explains Jesus to John, who is amazed at the child's reasoning and tears. And Jesus lifts the boy bodily and puts him on His knees. « Tell Me your name, child. I love you. Jesus loves all children and little orphans in particular. I have one as well, and his name is Marjiam and he...» « And I, too, because I (his thin voice becomes a hardly audible whisper) because I am a Roman...» « I told you. And you are an orphan, are you not?» « Yes... I do not remember my father. My mother... yes, I remember her. She died when I had already grown up... and I was left all alone, and nobody wanted me. From Caesarea on foot, following wayfarers, after the master had gone far away. And so hungry. And if I said my name, blows... Because they understood by my name, eh?! Then I came here, for a feast, and I was hungry. I went into the stables with a caravan and I hid in the straw to eat the forage and carobs of the donkeys. And a donkey bit me and I screamed and they rushed in and wanted to hit me. But Joseph said: “No, He has done it and He says that we must do what He does. And I am taking the boy and will make him an Israelite”. And he took me and looked after me with Mary and he gave me another name because mine... But my mother called me Martial...» and tears begin to stream down his cheeks once again. « And I will call you Martial as your mother did. It was very kind of Joseph to do what he did. You must love him.» « Yes, but I must love You more. He says so. He always says: “if one day you 506. In Joseph's House at Sephoris. Little Martial Named Manasseh. 353 should meet Jesus of Nazareth, the Messiah, love Him with your whole being, because it is through Him that you have been saved from error”. Mary, in the other room, was saying to the servant that the Messiah was in the house, and I came to see who had saved me.» « I did not know that Joseph had done this. He was so... stingy... I would never have thought that he could... Poor Joseph! Stingy and disgusted with his sons. They had no respect for his grey hair.» « I know. But see? Perhaps this child instills new life into him and... he forgets. God rewards him thus for what he did for the boy. What is your name, now?» « An ugly name. I like only the beginning of it, because it is like mine: Manasseh is my name!... But Mary, who understands, calls me “Man”.» And the boy repeats it with such a desolate expression that Jesus and John cannot help smiling. 5 And Jesus to comfort him explains: « Manasseh is a name with a kind meaning for us. It means: the Lord has made me forget all my suffering. Joseph gave it to you meaning that you will make him forget all his grief. And you will do so, My child, to be grateful to him. You yourself with your new name say that the Lord has loved you so much that he has given you a new father, a new mother and a home. Is it not so?» « Yes, when it is explained thus, yes... But Joseph says that I must forget also my house. I do not want to forget my mother!» Jesus looks at John, and John looks at the Master and above the dark head of the boy they exchange meaningful glances... « Your mother is not to be forgotten. Joseph did not make himself clear, or, more likely, you have misunderstood him. He certainly meant that you must forget all the grief of the past, the sorrow for your house, because now you have this one and you must be happy.» « Ah! that's all right. And Mary is good to me and makes me happy. Even now she is baking cakes. I will go and see whether they are ready and I will bring some to You as well » and he slides down from Jesus' knees and runs out of the room. The noise of his bare feet fades away in the long corridor. « There is always this hard tendency even in the best among us, They pretend what is impossible! The children of God's people are more severe than God Himself! Poor child! Can one expect a child to forget his mother because he is now circumcised? I will tell Joseph.» « I did not really know that he had done this. My father, like many Galileans, comes here at festivals. And he has not spoken to me about this as if he knew nothing about it... 6 But I hear Joseph's voice...» Jesus stands up and so does John, ready to greet with due respect the landlord who is coming in and who, in turn, bows repeatedly and ends by kneeling at Jesus' feet. « Stand up, Joseph. I have come, as you see.» « Forgive me if I kept You waiting. Friday is always a busy day! Hail, John. Have you news of Zebedee?» « Not since the Tabernacles, when I saw him.» « Well, I can tell you that he is well and so is Salome. Fresh news. This morning's. With the last delivery of fish. And I can also tell You, Master, that Your relatives are all well at Nazareth. The man who came will depart the day after the Sabbath. If you wish to send word... Are you alone?» « No. The others will be here shortly...» « Very well! There is room for everybody. This is a faithful house. I am sorry that Mary has been busy baking the bread and I with sales. We left you all alone... We failed to honour and keep You company as befits a guest. And a great guest!» « A son of God like you, Joseph. Those who follow the Law of God are all equal.» « Eh! no. You are You. I am not a fool like these Judaeans. You are the Messiah!» « That is by the will of God. But by My will and duty I am a son of the Law like you.» « Eh! Those who slander You cannot say and do what You are saying now and You always do!» 506. In Joseph's House at Sephoris. Little Martial Named Manasseh. 354 « But you do much of what I teach. 7 I have seen the boy, Joseph...» « Ah! Have You seen him? He came! He knows that I do not want that! In Your case... I am glad. But it might have been someone else...» « So? What would have happened?» « That... I do not like that, that's it!» « Why, Joseph? Not to be praised? Your thought is praiseworthy. But the child might think that you are ashamed to show him...» « And it's true!» « True? Why? Tell Me.» « Well. The boy is not a Hebrew born of Hebrews, not even of proselytes, or of a Hebrew mother and heathen father. He is the son of two Romans, a freed couple who lived in the house of a Roman at Caesarea on Sea. He kept the child while he remained there. But when he went away, he left the boy who remained alone. The Hebrews obviously would not accept him. The Romans... You know what the Romans are like... And those Romans of Caesarea above all! The boy, begging...» « Yes, I know. He arrived here and You accepted him. God has marked your deed in Heaven.» « And I had him circumcised! And I changed his name. His name! Pagan! Idolatrous! But I do not want him to mix with people and to remember his past.» « Why, Joseph!» Jesus asks kindly and He continues: « The boy suffers for that. He remembers his mother. It is understandable!» « But it is also understandable that I should not wish to be criticised for accepting a...» « An innocent. Nothing else, Joseph. Why are you afraid of the opinion of men, when a higher judgement, the divine one, confirms that your action is a holy one? Why are you ashamed, out of respect for public opinion, or for fear of retaliation, of a good deed? Why do you want to set for the boy an example of duplicity, such as arises from changing his name and cancelling his past, out of fear of being prejudiced? Why do you want to instill into the child contempt for his father and mother? See, Joseph, you have accomplished a praiseworthy deed, but you are covering it with dust, with such... imperfect ideas. You imitated one of My actions. You received My words. Which is good. But why do you not make My imitation perfect by completing it candidly and saying: “Yes. The boy was a Roman. And I did not feel disgust at him, because he is a son of the Creator like you. I only wanted him to be in our Law and I had him circumcised”.? Really... The true circumcision is about to come and the new incision will be made in men's hearts, from which the suffocating ring of treble concupiscence will be removed, thus even if the child had remained innocent until that time... But I do not wish to reproach you for that. You, a Hebrew, did the right thing in making him a Hebrew. But leave him his name. Oh! In future how many people named Martial, and Caius, and Felix, and Cornelius, and Claudius and so forth, will belong to the Christ and to Heaven! That is possible also for the boy, who knows nothing about Hebrews and Gentiles, and who will become of age when the new and true Law will be established with the new Temple and new priests, and not as you think, and he will be examined by God and found worthy of His new Temple. Leave him with the name given to him by his mother. It is still a motherly caress to him. I understand what you meant by calling him Manasseh. But let him be Martial. And to those who ask you about him, you may say: “Yes, he is Martial. Almost like the disciple of the Christ, the boy to whom Mary gave that name”. Be brave in goodness, Joseph. And you will be great, so great.» « Master... as You wish. I do not want to upset You. And do You think that... I did the right thing also as a man?» « Yes, you did. Your sorrow has made you good. So everything you have done is well done. And this deed is a good one.» Some knocks at the main door interrupt the conversation

505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans.

 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 30th September 1946. 1 Jesus goes back into the Temple with His apostles and disciples. And some of the apostles, and not only the apostles, point out to Him that it is not wise to go in. But He replies: « By what right could they refuse to let Me go in? Have I perhaps been condemned? No, not yet. So I am going up to the altar of God like every Israelite who fears the Lord.» « But You intend to speak… » « And is this not the place where rabbis usually gather to speak? To speak and teach outside is an exceptional case, such as the rest taken by a rabbi or a personal necessity. But this is the place where everyone loves to teach disciples. Do you not see people of every nationality around rabbis to hear the famous ones at least once? So that when they go back to their native countries they may say: “We heard a master, a philosopher speak according to the fashion of Israel”. A master for those who already are or intend to be Jews; a philosopher for the true and proper Gentiles. Neither do the rabbis disdain being listened to by the latter, as they hope to make proselytes. Without such hope, which would be holy if it were humble, they would not remain in the Court of the Gentiles, but they would demand to speak in that of Israel, and if it were possible, in the very Sanctuary, because, according to the opinion they hold of themselves, they are so holy, that God only is holier… And I, the Master, will speak where teachers speak. But be not afraid! It is not their hour as yet. When their hour comes, I will tell you, that you may fortify your hearts.» « You will not tell us » says the Iscariot. « Why not?» « Because You will not know. No sign will tell You. There is no sign. I have been with You for almost three years and I have always seen You threatened and persecuted. Nay, You were alone then. Now You have the support of the crowds who love You and of whom the Pharisees are afraid. So You are in a stronger position. How do You expect to know when the hour has come?» « By what I see in the hearts of men.» Judas remains dumbfounded for a moment, then he says: « And You will not mention it also because… You spare us because You doubt our courage.» « He keeps silent not to distress us » says James of Zebedee. « True. But You will certainly not tell us.» « I will tell you. And until I tell you, whatever violence and hatred you see against Me, be not afraid of it. They will have no consequences. 2 Go on. I am staying here to wait for Manaen and Marjiam.» The Twelve and those who are with them go on halfheartedly. Jesus retraces His steps towards the gate waiting for the two, He then goes out into the street and walks towards the Antonia. Some legionaries standing near the fortress point Him out chatting to one another. There seems to be some disagreement in opinion, then one of them says in a loud voice: « I'll ask Him » and he departs from the group coming towards Jesus. « Hail, Master. Are You speaking in there also today?» « May the Light enlighten you. Yes. I am going to speak.» « In that case… be careful. One who knows has warned us. And a lady who admires You has ordered us to watch. We shall be near the eastern underground. Do You know where the entrance is?» « I do. But both ends are closed.» « Do You think so?» The legionary has a little laugh and in the shadow of his helmet his eyes and teeth shine making him look younger. He then salutes coming to attention and says: « Hail, Master. Remember Quintus Felix.» 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 345 « I will. May the Light enlighten you.» Jesus resumes walking and the legionary goes back to his place and talks to his fellow-soldiers. « Master, are we late? The lepers were so many!» exclaim together Manaen, who is wearing a plain dark brown garment, and Marjiam. « No. You have been quick. But let us go. The others are waiting for us. Manaen, was it you who warned the Romans?» « Of what, Lord? I have not spoken to anybody. And I would not know… The Roman ladies are not in Jerusalem.» They are once again near the gate of the enclosure. The Levite Zacharias is there, as if he happened to be there just by chance. « Peace to You, Master. I want to tell You… I will try to be always where You are, in here. And please do not lose sight of me. And if there is a tumult and You see me go away, try to follow me all the time. They hate You so much! I cannot do any more… Please understand me… » « May God reward and bless you for the pity you take on His Word. I will do what you say. And you may rest assured that no one will be aware of your love for Me.» They part. « Perhaps he told the Romans. While in there he may have heard… » whispers Manaen. 3 They go to pray passing through the crowds who look at them with different feelings and who later gather behind Jesus, when He comes away from the Court of Israel after praying. Outside the second enclosure Jesus is about to stop, but He is surrounded by a mixed group of scribes, Pharisees and priests. One of the officials of the Temple speaks on behalf of them all. « Are You here again? Do You not realise that we do not want You? Are You not even afraid of the danger impending over You? Go away. It is already a lot if we allow You to come in to pray. But we do not allow You to teach Your doctrine any more.» « Yes, go away. Go away, You blasphemer!» « Yes. I am going away, as you wish. And not only out of these walls. I will go, I am already going farther, where you will not be able to reach Me. And the time will come when you also will be looking for Me, and not just to persecute Me, but through a superstitious terror of being struck for driving Me away, urged by a superstitious anxiety to have your sin forgiven and receive mercy. But I am telling you. This is the time of mercy. This is the time to make friends with the Most High. After the present time, no remedy will be of any avail. You will not have Me any more and you will die in your sin. Even if you travelled all over the Earth and you succeeded in arriving at stars and planets, you would no longer find Me, because you cannot come where I am going. I have already told you. God comes and passes by. Those who are wise receive Him with His gifts while He passes by. Those who are foolish let Him go and no longer can find Him. You come from down here. I come from up there. You belong to this world. I am not of this world. So, once I have gone back to the Abode of My Father, out of this world of yours, you will not be able to find Me any longer and you will die in your sins, because you will not even be able to reach Me spiritually through faith.» « Do You want to kill Yourself, You devil? We will certainly not be able to join You in Hell, where violent souls descend, because Hell is the place of damned cursed souls, whereas we are the blessed children of the Most High » some of them say. And others say approvingly: « He certainly wants to kill Himself, because He says that we cannot go where He goes. He realises that He has been found out and has failed the test, and He is going to kill Himself, without waiting to be killed like the other Galilean who was a false Christ.» And others say benevolently: « And if He really were the Christ and should go back to Him Who sent Him?» « Where? In Heaven? Abraham is not there, so how can you expect Him to go there? The Messiah is to come first.» « But Elijah was taken up to Heaven in a chariot of fire.» « On a chariot, yes. But to Heaven!… Who can assure that?» And the dispute continues while Pharisees, scribes, officials, priests, Judaeans 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 346 obsequious to priests, scribes and Pharisees pursue the Christ through the vast porches as a pack of hounds chases roused game. 4 But some people, that is the good ones among the hostile group, those urged by real honest intentions, elbow their way through the crowd until they reach Jesus and ask Him the anxious question, which has been heard being asked so often with love or with hatred: « Who are You? Tell us so that we may know how to behave. Tell us the truth in the name of the Most High!» « I am the Truth itself and I never tell lies. I am what I have always declared to be since the first day I spoke to the crowds, in every place in Palestine, what I said I am, here, several times, near the Holy of Holies, of Whose thunderbolts I am not afraid, because I speak the truth. I have still many things to say and to judge during My day and with regard to this people, and although My evening seems to be close at hand, I know that I shall tell them and I shall judge everybody, because that is what I have been promised by Him Who sent Me and is truthful. He spoke to Me in an eternal embrace of love, telling Me all His Thought, so that I could repeat it by means of My Word to the world, and I shall not be able to be silent, neither will anybody be able to silence Me until I announce to the world what I heard from My Father.» « Are You still blaspheming? And are You continuing to call Yourself the Son of God? But who do You expect to believe You? Who will ever be able to see the Son of God in You?» shout His enemies shaking their fists at His face, deranged as they are by hatred. The apostles, disciples and well-meaning people drive them back forming a protective barrier round the Master. Zacharias, the levite, steals slowly close to Jesus, Manaen and Alphaeus' two sons with stealthy movements in order not to attract the attention of the evil ones. 5 They are now at the end of the Court of the Gentiles as progress is slow owing to the hindering opposition and Jesus stops at His usual place, at the last column of the eastern side. He stops. They cannot eject a true Israelite from the place where even pagans are allowed to stay, unless they wish to rouse the masses. Which they craftily avoid doing. And He resumes speaking replying to His offenders and everybody else: « When you have lifted up the Son of man… » The Pharisees and scribes shout: « And who do You expect is going to lift You up? Miserable is that Country whose king is a silly charlatan and a blasphemer disliked by God. None of us will lift You up, You may be sure of that. And the little intelligence You are still left with has made You realise that in time, when You were put to the test. You know that we shall never be able to make You our king!» « I know. You will not raise Me to a throne, and yet you will lift Me up. And while lifting Me up you will think that you are lowering Me. And just when you think that you have lowered Me, I shall be raised. Not only over Palestine, not only over the people of Israel spread all over the world, but over the whole world, even over pagan countries, even over those countries of which the learned people of the world are still unaware. And I shall be raised not only for the lifetime of a man, but for the whole life of the Earth and the shadow of My throne will spread more and more over the Earth until it covers it completely. Then only, I will come back and you will see Me. Oh! You shall see Me!» « Listen to His speech of a madman! We shall raise Him by lowering Him, and we shall lower Him by raising Him! He's mad! And the shadow of His throne all over the Earth. Greater than Cyrus! Greater than Alexander! Greater than Caesar! And what about Caesar? Do You think he will allow You to take the Roman empire? And He is going to last on His throne until the end of the world! Ha! Ha!» Their words are more grievous than slaps; their irony is more painful than scourging. 6 But Jesus lets them speak. He raises His voice to be heard in the outcry of those who deride and of those who defend, filling the place with the roar of a rough sea. « When you have raised the Son of man, then you will understand who I am and you will realise that I do nothing by Myself, but I say what My Father taught Me and I do what He wants. And He Who sent Me does not leave Me all alone, but He is with Me. As a shadow follows a body, so is the Father behind Me, watchful and present, although invisible. He is behind Me and comforts and helps Me and He does not go away because I always do what He likes. God instead goes away when His children do not obey His laws and His inspirations. He then goes away and leaves them all alone. That is why many people in Israel commit sin. Because when man is left to himself, it is difficult for him to remain just and he easily falls into the coils of the Snake. I solemnly tell you that because of your sin in resisting the Light and Mercy of God, He leaves you and will no longer dwell in this place or in your hearts and what Jeremiah grieved 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 347 over in his prophecies and lamentations will be fulfilled. Meditate on those prophetical words, tremble and return to your senses with good minds. Do not listen to the threats but to the kindness of the Father Who warns His children while they are still granted the possibility to make amends and save themselves. Listen to God in His words and deeds, and if you do not want to believe My words, because old Israel is suffocating you, believe at least in old Israel. Her prophets proclaim the dangers and misfortunes of the Holy City and of all our Fatherland if she does not convert to the Lord her God and does not follow the Saviour. The hand of God weighed heavily on this people in the past. But the past and present are nothing as compared to the dreadful future, which is awaiting it for not accepting the Messenger sent by God. What is awaiting Israel who repudiates the Christ cannot be compared with the past in severity and duration. I am telling you, straining My eyes into future ages: like a tree uprooted and thrown into a stormy river, the Hebraic race will be struck by divine anathema. It will stubbornly try to stop on the banks, here or there, and vigorous as it is, it will sprout and take root. But when it thinks it has settled, the violence of the flood will get hold of it again, tearing it away and breaking its roots and shoots, and it will be carried farther away, to suffer, to strike roots again, and then be torn off and scattered once more. And nothing will be able to give it rest, because the flood pursuing it will be the wrath of God and the contempt of peoples. Only by throwing itself into a sea of living sanctifying Blood it could find peace. But it will shun that Blood, because although its voice will be an inviting one, it will sound like the voice of Abel's blood calling it: the Cain of the heavenly Abel.» A further widespread whispering runs through the large enclosure like the noise of the sea. But the harsh voices of Pharisees, scribes and of the Jews subjected to them, are not part of the whispering. Jesus avails Himself of the opportunity to try to go away. 7 But some people who were far from Him, approach Him and say: « Master, listen to us. We are not all like them (and they point at His enemies), but we find it difficult to follow You also because Your voice is all by itself against hundreds of voices which state the opposite of what You say. And what they say is just what we have heard from our fathers since our childhood. But Your words induce us to believe in You. But how can we believe fully and have life? We feel as if we were tied by the thoughts of the past… » « If you settle in My Word, as if you were being born again now, your faith will be complete and you will become My disciples. But you must divest yourselves of the past and accept My Doctrine. It does not delete the past completely. On the contrary it keeps and instills new life into what is holy and supernatural in the past, and it removes the superfluous human additions as it puts the perfection of My Doctrine where now are human doctrines, which are always imperfect. If you come to Me you will know the Truth, and the Truth will make you free.» « Master, it is true what we said to You, that we feel as if we were tied by the past. But that tie is neither imprisonment nor slavery. We are Abraham's posterity in spiritual matters, because, if we are not mistaken, Abraham's posterity means spiritual posterity as opposed to Hagar's, which is a posterity of slaves. So how can You say that we shall become free?» « I wish to point out to you that also Ishmael and his children were Abraham's posterity, because Abraham was the father of Isaac and of Ishmael.» « But it was impure because he was the son of a woman, who was a slave and an Egyptian.» « I solemnly tell you: there is but one slavery, that of sin. Only he who commits sin is a slave. And of a slavery which no money can ransom; and he is the slave of an implacable cruel master and loses all rights to the free sovereignty in the Kingdom of Heaven. A slave, a man who has become slave through war or misfortunes, may also become the property of a good master. But his welfare is always precarious because his master can sell him to another cruel master. He is merchandise, nothing else. Sometimes he is used as money to settle a debt. And he is not even entitled to complain. A servant instead lives in the house of his master until he is dismissed. But a son remains in the house of his father for good, and the father does not think of expelling him. He can go out only of his own free will. And that is the difference between slavery and servitude, and between servitude and filiation. Slavery puts man in chains. Servitude puts him at the service of a master. Filiation puts him for ever, and with equal rights of life, in the house of the father. Slavery destroys man. Servitude subjects him. Filiation makes him free and happy. Sin makes man the slave and for ever, of the most cruel master: Satan. Servitude, in this case the Ancient Law, makes man fear God as an intransigent Being. Filiation, that is, to come to God with His First-Born, with Me, makes man free and happy, as he knows and trusts in the charity of his Father. To accept My Doctrine is to come to God with Me, the First-Born of many beloved children. I will break your chains, if you only come 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 348 to Me to have them broken and you will really be happy and coheirs with Me to the Kingdom of Heaven. I know that you are Abraham's posterity. But those among you who seek My death no longer honour Abraham, but Satan, and serve him as faithful servants. Why? Because they reject My word which cannot get to the hearts of many of you. God does not compel man to believe or to accept Me. But He sent Me that I may show you His will. And I tell you what I saw and heard near My Father. And I do what He wants. But those among you who persecute Me, do what they learnt from their father and what he suggests.» 8 Like a paroxysm which revives after a remission of a disease, the wrath of Judaeans, Pharisees and scribes is roused violently again, although it seemed to have abated. They penetrate like a wedge into the compact circle of people pressing Jesus and they try to approach Him. The crowd sways like opposed billows, as opposed are the feelings of their hearts. The Judaeans, livid with rage and hatred shout: « Abraharn is our father. We have no other father.» « God is the Father of men. Abraham himself is a son of the universal Father. But many repudiate the true Father for one who is not a father and has been chosen as such by them because he seems more powerful and willing to satisfy their immoderate desires. Children do the works that they see their father do. If you are sons of Abraham, why do you not do the works that Abraham did? Do you not know them? Shall I enumerate them with regard to their nature and symbol? Abraham obeyed by going to the country pointed out to him by God, and is thus the symbol of man who must be prepared to leave everything to go where God sends him. Abraham was obliging with his brother's son, whom he allowed to choose the region he preferred, thus symbolising respect for freedom of action and the charitable mind we must have for our neighbour. Abraham was humble after the predilection of God, Whom he honoured in Mamre, always feeling that he was a mere nothing in comparison with the Most High, Who had spoken to him, a symbol of the place of reverential love man must always keep towards his God. Abraham believed and obeyed God also in the most difficult matters to believe and painful to accomplish, and he did not become selfish in order to be safe, but he prayed for the people of Sodom. Abraham did not come to terms with the Lord, by requesting a reward for his manifold obedience, on the contrary, in order to honour Him till the very end, to the extreme limit, he sacrificed his beloved son to Him… » « He did not sacrifice him.» « He did sacrifice his beloved son because it is true that his heart had already sacrificed him, during the journey, with his will to obey, which was arrested by the angel when his heart of a father was already breaking, as he was on the point of rending the heart of his son. He was going to kill his son in order to honour God. You are killing the Son of God to honour Satan. So, do you do the works of Him Whom you call your father? No, you do not. You are trying to kill Me because I tell you the truth as I heard it from God. Abraham did not behave thus. He did not try to kill the voice coming from Heaven, but he obeyed it. No, you do not do the works of Abraham, but those pointed out to you by your father.» 9 « We were not born of a prostitute. We are not illegitimate children. You said Yourself that God is the Father of men, and we are the chosen People and we belong to the chosen castes of this People. So we have God as our only Father.» « If you recognised God as your Father in spirit and truth you would love Me because I proceed and come from God; I have not come of My own accord, but it is He Who sent Me. So, if you really knew the Father, you would know also Me, His Son and your brother and Saviour. Is it possible for brothers not to know one another? Can the children of One only father not recognise the language spoken in the House of the Only Father? Why, then, do you not understand My language and you cannot bear My words? Because I come from God and you do not. You left the paternal house and you have forgotten the face and the language of Him Who lives in it. You have spontaneously gone to other regions, to other abodes, where one who is not God reigns, and where another language is spoken. And he who reigns there compels those who want to go in to become his children and obey him. And you have done that and still do it. You abjure and disown God the Father to choose another father for yourselves. And that father is Satan. You have the demon as father and you want to accomplish what he suggests to you. And the wishes of the demon are for sin and violence and you accept them. From the beginning he was a homicide and he did not persevere in the truth, because having rebelled against the Truth, he cannot have in himself any love for the truth. When he speaks, he speaks as he is, that is, as a liar and a gloomy being, because he really is a liar and has procreated and given birth to falsehood after being fecundated with pride and nourished with rebellion. All concupiscence is in his bosom, and he spits it and inoculates it to poison creatures. He is the gloomy, sneering, creeping cursed reptile, the Disgrace and Horror. His deeds have tormented man for ages and their signs and fruits are clear to the intellects of men. And yet you 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 349 listen to him, although he lies and destroys, whereas if I speak and say what is true and good, you do not believe Me and you say that I am a sinner. But among the many people who have approached Me, with hatred or with love, who can say that he saw Me commit sin? Who can say so truthfully? Where are the proofs to convince Me and those who believe in Me that I am a sinner? Which of the ten commandments have I infringed? Who can swear before the altar of God that he saw Me violate the Law and customs, the precepts, traditions and prayers? Who amongst all men can make Me blush, having convinced Me of sin with definite proofs? No one can do that. No one amongst men, no one amongst angels. God shouts in the hearts of men: “He is the Innocent One”. You are all convinced of that, and you who are accusing Me are more firmly persuaded than these people who are undecided as to who is right, you or I. But only who belongs to God listens to the words of God. You do not listen to them, although they resound in your souls day and night, and you do not listen to them because you do not belong to God.» 10 « We, who live for the Law and in the most detailed observation of the precepts, to honour the Most High, we do not belong to God? And You dare say that? Ah!!!» They seem to be suffocating with horror, as if a halter were fastened round their necks. « And we are not to say that You are possessed and a Samaritan?» « I am neither, but I honour My Father, even if you deny Him to revile Me. But your insults do not grieve Me. I do not seek My glory. There is One who takes care of it and judges. That is what I say to you who want to humiliate Me. But to those of good will I say that he who accepts My word, or has already accepted it, and knows how to keep it, will never die.» « Ah! Now we can see very clearly that the demon possessing You is speaking through Your lips! You said that Yourself: “He speaks like a liar”. What You said is a lie, therefore it is a word of the demon. Abraham died and the prophets died. And You say that those who keep Your word will never die. So You will not die?» « I shall die only as Man, to rise again in the time of Grace, but I shall not die as the Word. The Word is Life and never dies. And he who receives the Word has Life in himself and never dies, but rises in God because I will resuscitate him.» « Blasphemer Madman! Demon! Are You greater than Abraham and the prophets, who died? Who do You think You are?» « The Beginning Who am speaking to you.» There is absolute pandemonium. And while it goes on, the Levite Zacharias pushes Jesus imperceptibly towards a corner in the court, helped by the sons of Alphaeus and by other people, who perhaps assist Him without even knowing what they are doing. 11 When Jesus is against the wall and is protected by His most faithful ones standing in front of Him and the tumult calms down a little, He says in His voice which is so incisive, beautiful and calm also in the most troubled moments: « If I glorify Myself, My glory is of no value. Anyone can say of oneself what one wishes. But He Who glorifies Me is My Father, Who you say is your God, although He is so little yours that you do not know Him, and you have never known Him, neither do you want to know Him through Me, as I speak to you of Him because I know Him; and if I should say that I do not know Him, to appease your hatred against Me, I would be a liar like you who say that you know Him. I know that I must not lie for any reason whatsoever. The Son of man must not lie even if by telling the truth He will bring about His death. Because if the Son of man should lie, He would no longer be the Son of Truth and the Truth would reject Him from Itself. I know God, both as God and as Man. And as God and as Man I keep His words and comply with them. Israel, think it over! It is here that the Promise is fulfilled. It is accomplished in Me. Recognise Me for what I am! Abraham, your father, longed to see My day. He saw it, prophetically, through a grace of God, and he rejoiced. And you who really live it… » « Be quiet! You are not yet fifty years old and You are telling us that Abraham has seen You and You have seen him?» and their scornful laugh spreads like a wave of poison or corrosive acid. « I solemnly tell you: before Abraham was born I am.» « “I am”.? God only can say that, as He is eternal. You cannot! Blasphemer! “I am”.! Anathema! Are You perhaps God, that You may say that?» shouts one, who must be an important personage, because, although he has just arrived, he is already near Jesus, as everybody has moved aside, almost in terror, at his arrival. « It is you who say it » replies Jesus in a thundering voice. 12 Everything becomes a weapon in the hands of those who hate. While the last man who has questioned Jesus gives free course to a mimic display of 505. Jesus Speaks in the Temple to the Incredulous Judaeans. 350 scandalised horror and tears his headgear off his head, ruffles his hair and beard and unfastens the buckles holding his mantle round his neck, as if he were about to faint with horror, handfuls of earth and stones − used by the vendors of doves and other animals to hold tight the ropes of the enclosures, and by moneychangers as a prudential protection for their coffers, of which they are more jealous than of their own lives − are thrown at the Master and obviously fall upon the crowd, as Jesus is too far inside the arcade to be struck, and the crowds curse and complain… Zacharias, the levite, gives Jesus a mighty push, the only means to make Him reach a little low door, hidden in the wall of the court and already set to be opened, and pushes Him inside with the two sons of Alphaeus, John, Manaen and Thomas. The others are left outside in the tumult… its noise arrives weakened in the underground passage, among the mighty stone walls, the correct architectural name of which I do not know. The stones are embedded, I would say, that is, there are large stones and smaller ones, and on top of the smaller ones there are large ones and viceversa. I do not know whether I have made myself clear. They are dark and mighty, coarsely chiselled, hardly visible in the dim light coming from narrow loopholes placed high up at regular intervals to admit air and light so that the place may not be completely murky. It is a narrow tunnel, the purpose of which I do not know, but I am under the impression that it runs right round the court. Perhaps it was built as a protection, as a shelter place, or to double and thus reinforce the walls of the courts, which form enclosures round the true and proper Temple, the Holy of Holies. In brief, I do not know. I am saying what I see. There is a smell of dampness, that kind of dampness that one cannot say whether it is cold or not, as in certain winecellars. « And what are we going to do here?» asks Thomas. « Be quiet! Zacharias told me that he will come and we must remain silent and still » replies Thaddeus. « But… can we trust him?» « I hope so.» « Be not afraid. He is a good man » says Jesus comforting them. Outside the noise of the tumult fades away. Some time goes by. Then the dull sound of steps and a tiny flickering light coming from the dark depth. « Are You there, Master?» asks a voice that wants to be heard but is afraid of being heard. « Yes, Zacharias, I am here.» « Praised be Jehovah! Have I kept You waiting? I had to wait for the others to rush to the other exits. Come, Master… Your apostles… I have been able to tell Simon to go all together towards Bezetha and wait there. We go down here… There is not much light, but it's a safe way. It takes us down to the cisterns… and we come out near the Kidron. An old way. Not always used for a good purpose. But this time it is… And that sanctifies it… » They continue to go down in the deep shade broken only by the flickering light of the lamp, until a different gleam is seen down at the bottom… and beyond it some green appears in the distance… A railing, so heavy and thick that it looks like a door, is at the end of the tunnel. « Master, I have saved You. You can go. But listen to me. Do not come back for some time. I could not serve You every time without being noticed. And… forget, all of you must forget this passage and me who brought you here » says Zacharias, working some devices of the heavy railing, which he opens just enough to let them go out. And he repeats: « Forget all about this, for my sake.» « Be not afraid. None of us will speak. And may God be with you for your charity.» Jesus raises His hand and lays it on the bowed head of the young man. He goes out followed by His cousins and the others. He finds Himself in a small wild open space, covered with bramble, so small that it can hardly contain them all, facing the Mount of Olives. A very steep path runs down among the bramble towards the torrent. « Let us go. We will climb up again to the height of the Gate of the Sheep and I will go to Joseph's with My brothers, whilst you will go to Bezetha to get the others and will then join Me. We will go to Nob tomorrow evening after sunset.»

504. Jesus, Light of the World.

 504. Jesus, Light of the World. 28th September 1946. 1 Jesus is still in Jerusalem, but not in the courts of the Temple. He is in a beautifully decorated vast room, one of the many to be found within the enclosure, which is as large as a village. He has just gone in and is still walking beside the person who invited Him to go in probably to protect Him from the cold wind blowing on the Moriah, and He is followed by the apostles and some disciples. I say « some », because besides Isaac and Marjiam there is Jonathan, and among the crowds, who also go in behind the Master, there is the levite Zacharias, who a few days previously told Him that he wanted to be His disciple, and there are two more men, whom I have already seen with the disciples, but whose names I do not know. But among those well-disposed people there are also the usual unavoidable unchangeable Pharisees. They stop almost at the door, just as if they happened to be there by chance to discuss business, but they are there to listen. The people present are eager to hear the word of the Lord. He looks at the assembly of people of clearly different nationalities, as they are not all Palestinians, although of Jewish religion. He looks at all the people gathered, many of whom will perhaps return tomorrow to the regions from which they came and will relate His word there saying: « We have heard the Man Who is said to be our Messiah.» And He does not speak to them of the Law, as they are already acquainted with it, as He often does when He realises that His listeners are not familiar with it or their faith is shaken; but He speaks of Himself, that they may know Him. He says: « I am the Light of the world and he who follows Me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of life.» And He becomes silent, after enunciating the theme of His speech, as He usually does when He is going to deliver a momentous speech. He keeps silent to give the people time to decide whether they are interested in the subject or not, and also to give them time to go away if the subject is of no interest to them. None of the people present go away; on the contrary the Pharisees, who were near the door, intent on a forced affected conversation, and who have become silent and have turned towards the interior of the synagogue at Jesus' first word, go in elbowing their way with their unfailing arrogance. 2 When all the whispering is over, Jesus repeats the aforesaid sentence in an 504. Jesus, Light of the World. 342 even louder voice and He goes on to say: « I am the Light of the world because I am the Son of the Father, Who is the Father of the Light. A son is always like the father who begot him and is of the same nature. Likewise I am like and I have the same nature as He Who begot Me. God, the Most High, the perfect and Infinite Spirit, is Light of Love, Light of Wisdom, Light of Power, Light of Goodness, Light of Beauty. He is the Father of the Lights, and he who lives of Him and in Him can see, because he is in the Light, as it is God's desire that men should see. And He gave man intelligence and feelings, that he might see the Light, that is, God Himself, and understand and love it. And He gave man eyes, that he might see the most beautiful of all things created, the perfection of elements, through which Creation is visible and which is one of the first actions of God Creator and bears the most visible sign of Him Who created it: light, the incorporeal, bright, beatific, consoling, necessary light, as is necessary the Father of all: God Eternal and Most High. By an order of His Thought He created the firmament and the earth, that is, the mass of the atmosphere and the mass of dust, the incorporeal and the corporeal, what is very light and what is heavy, but both still barren, void and shapeless, because they were enveloped in darkness, devoid of stars and lifeless. But to give the earth and the firmament their true features, to make of them two beautiful things, useful and suitable for the continuation of His creative work, the Spirit of God − that hovered over the waters and was one thing with the Creator Who was creating and with the Inspirer Who urged to create, in order to be able to love not only Himself in the Father and in the Son, but also an infinite number of creatures named stars, planets, waters, seas, forests, plants, flowers, animals that fly, wriggle, creep, run, jump, climb, and finally man, the most perfect creature, more perfect than the sun, because he is endowed with soul as well as with matter, with intelligence as well as with instinct, with freedom as well as with rules, man similar to God because of his spirit, similar to animals because of his body, the demigod who becomes god by the grace of God and his own will, the human being who can transform himself into an angel, if he wishes so, the beloved being of sensible Creation, for whom, although He knew that he would be a sinner, even before time existed, He prepared the Saviour, the Victim in the Being loved beyond measure, in the Son, in the Word, for Whom everything was made − but to give the earth and the firmament their true features, as I was saying, the Spirit of God, hovering over the cosmos, shouts, and it is the first time that the Word shows Himself: “Let there be light” and there was light, good, beneficial, strong during the day, dim at night, everlasting until the end of time. From the ocean of wonders, which is the throne of God, the bosom of God, God draws the most beautiful gem, and it is the light preceding the most perfect gem, that is, the creation of man, in whom there is not a jewel of God, but God Himself, breathing over the dust to make it living flesh and His heir to the heavenly Paradise where He awaits the just, His children, that He may rejoice in them and they in Him. If at the beginning of creation God wanted light on His works, if to make light He used His Word, if God grants those, whom He beloves, His most perfect likeness: light, material joyful incorporeal light, wise sanctifying spiritual light, is it possible that He has not given the Son of His love what He is Himself? Really the Most High has given everything to Him in Whom He is well pleased from eternity, and He wanted the Light to be the first and the most powerful of everything, so that without waiting to ascend to Heaven men might know the wonder of the Trinity, that makes the blissful heavenly choruses sing because of the harmonious joy they admire, and that angels enjoy contemplating the Light, that is, God, the Light that fills Paradise making all its inhabitants blissful. I am the Light of the world. He who follows Me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of Life! As light on the shapeless earth made life possible for plants and animals, so My Light makes eternal Life possible for spirits. I, being the Light that I am, create Life in you and I preserve it, I increase it, I re-create you in it, I transform you, I take you to the Abode of God along the ways of wisdom, of love, of sanctification. He who has the Light, possesses God, because the Light is one thing with Charity and he who has Charity has God. He who has the Light possesses the Life, because God is there where His beloved Son is welcomed.» 3 « You are talking nonsense. Who has seen what is God? Not even Moses saw God, because in Horeb, as soon as he realised who was speaking from the blazing bush, he covered his face; neither could he see Him on the other occasions because of the dazzling lightning. And You say that You saw God? The face of Moses, who had only heard Him speak, remained brightly radiant. But what radiance is there on Your face? You are a poor Galilean with a pale face like most of Your countrymen. You are ill, tired and thin. If You had really seen God and He did love You, You would not look like a dying man. You want to give Your life, when You have not got enough for Yourself?» and they shake their heads pitying Him ironically. 504. Jesus, Light of the World. 343 « God is Light and I know which is His Light, because children know their father and each knows himself. I know My Father and I know who I am. I am the Light of the world. I am the Light because My Father is the Light and He begot Me and gave Me His Nature. The Word does not differ from the Thought because the word expresses what the intellect thinks. In any case, do you no longer know the prophets? Do you not remember Ezekiel and above all Daniel? When the former describes God, seen in the vision, on the chariot of the four animals, he says: “On the throne there was one who looked like a man and within him and around him I saw a kind of yellow amber which resembled fire, and from his loins upwards and downwards I saw a kind of fire and a light all around; like a rainbow in the clouds on rainy days, that is how the surrounding light appeared”. And Daniel says: “I was watching until the thrones were set in place and the Ancient of days took his seat. His robe was as white as snow, his hair as pure as wool; his throne was a blaze of flames and the wheels of his throne were a burning fire. A stream of fire poured out issuing from his presence”. God is like that and I shall be like that when I come to judge you.» 4 « Your testimony is not valid. You bear witness to Yourself. So what is the value of Your testimony? As far as we are concerned it is false.» « Although I bear witness to Myself, My witness is true, because I know from where I came and where I am going. But you know neither from where I come nor where I am going. Your wisdom is what you see. I instead know everything that is unknown to man, and I have come that you may become acquainted with it as well. That is why I said that I am the Light. Because light reveals what was concealed by darkness. In Heaven there is Light, on the Earth there is, above all, the reign of Darkness, which conceals the truth from spirits, because Darkness hates the spirits of men and does not want them to become acquainted with the Truth and the truths, so that they may not be sanctified. And that is why I came. That you may have Light and consequently Life. But you do not want to receive Me. You want to judge what you do not know and you cannot judge it because it is so much higher up than you are and cannot be understood by anyone who does not contemplate it with the eyes of the spirit, of a humble spirit nourished with faith. Instead you judge according to the flesh. So your judgement cannot be true. I instead do not judge anybody, if I can abstain from judging. I look at you mercifully and I pray for you. That you may open out to Light. But when I have to judge, then My judgement is true, because I am not alone, but I am with the Father Who sent Me, and from His glory He can see the interior of hearts. And as He sees yours, He can see Mine. And if He saw an unjust judgement in My heart, for My sake and for the honour of His Justice, He would inform Me. But the Father and I judge in one way only and so we are in two and I am not alone in judging and bearing witness. In your Law it is written that the testimony of two witnesses giving the same evidence is to be accepted as true and valid. So I bear witness to My Nature and the Father Who sent Me testifies the same thing. So what I say is true.» 5 « We cannot hear the voice of the Most High. You say that He is Your Father...» « He spoke of Me at the Jordan...» « All right. But You were not the only one at the Jordan. There was also John. He might have spoken of him. He was a great prophet.» « You are condemning yourselves with your own lips. Tell Me: who speaks through the lips of the prophets?» « The Spirit of God.» « And was John a prophet according to you?» « One of the greatest, if not the greatest.» « Well then, why did you not believe his words and why do you not believe them? He pointed Me out as the Lamb of God, Who had come to cancel the sins of the world. When he was asked whether he was the Christ, he replied: “I am not the Christ, I am one who precedes Him. And behind me there is He Who actually precedes me, because He existed before me, and I did not know Him, but He Who took me from the womb of my mother and invested me with my mission in the desert and sent me to baptise, said to me: 'He upon Whom you will see the Spirit descend, He is the One Who will baptise with the Holy Spirit and fire'”. Do you not remember? And yet many among you were present... So why do you not believe the prophet who pointed Me out after hearing the words of Heaven? Have I to tell My Father this: that His people no longer believes in the prophets?» « And where is Your father? Joseph the carpenter has been sleeping for years in his sepulchre. You no longer have a father.» « You know neither My Father nor Me. But if you wanted to know Me, you would know also My true Father.»  « You are possessed and a liar. You are a blasphemer as You insist in maintaining that the Most High is Your Father. You deserve to be stoned according to the Law.» The Pharisees and the others of the Temple shout threateningly while the people look at them grimly, anxious as they are to defend the Christ. Jesus looks at them without saying anything further, and He then leaves the room by a little side door opening onto a porch.

503. The Parable of the Unscrupulous Judge

 503. The Parable of the Unscrupulous Judge. 27th September 1946. 1 Jesus is once again in Jerusalem. A windy dull Jerusalem in winter. Marjiam is  still with Jesus and Isaac also is there. They are speaking while going to the Temple. Joseph and Nicodemus are with the Twelve speaking to the Zealot and Thomas more than to the others. They then part and when passing before Jesus they greet Him without stopping. « They do not want to enhance their friendship with the Master. It is dangerous!» hisses the Iscariot in Andrew's ear. « I think they do that with an honest thought, not out of cowardice » replies Andrew defending them. « After all they are not disciples. So they can do that. They have never been disciples » says the Zealot. « No?! I thought… » « Not even Lazarus is a disciple, neither is… » « But if you go on excluding, who will be left?» « Who? Those who have the mission of disciples.» « And the others, then, what are they?» « Friends. Nothing but friends. Do they perhaps leave their homes, their interests, to follow Jesus?» « No. But they listen to Him with pleasure and they give Him assistance and… » « Well, if that's the case, also the Gentiles do it. You know that near Nike's house we met people who had provided for Him. And those women are certainly not disciples.» « Don't get excited! I was saying so just for the sake of speaking. Are you so anxious that your friends should not appear to be disciples? I think that you should want the opposite.» « I am not getting excited and I do not want anything. Neither do I want you to harm them saying that they are His disciples.» « How can I say that to anybody? I am always with you… » Simon Zealot casts such a severe glance at him that Judas' giggle dies on his lips, and he deems it wise to change subject by asking: « What were they wanting, today, to speak to you thus?» « They found a house for Nike. Near the market-gardens. Near the Gate. Joseph knew the owner and he was aware that he would sell if he got a good price. We will let Nike know.» « How anxious she is to throw away money!» « It is her money and she can do what she likes with it. She wants to be near the Master. She thus complies with the will of her husband and with her own heart.» « Only my mother is far away… » exclaims James of Alphaeus with a sigh. « And mine » says the other James. « But not for long. Did you hear what Jesus said to Isaac, John and Matthias? “When you come back at the new moon of Shebat, come with the women disciples, in addition to My Mother”.» « I do not know why He does not want Marjiam to come back with them. He said to him: “You will come when I send for you”.» « Perhaps because He does not want Porphirea to be left without help… If no one goes out fishing, they have no food up there. Since we do not go, Marjiam has to go. A fig-tree, a beehive, a few olivetrees and two sheep are not enough to keep a woman, to dress her and feed her… » remarks Andrew. 2 Jesus, leaning against the enclosure wall of the Temple, watches them coming. Peter, Marjiam and Judas of Alphaeus are with Him. Some poor people get up from the slabs placed on the road going towards the Temple − the one coming from Zion towards Moriah, not that coming from Ophel to the Temple − and they go moaning towards Jesus begging for alms. None of them ask to be cured. Jesus tells Judas to give them some coins. He then goes into the Temple. There are not many people. After the large multitudes at festivals, there are no more pilgrims. Only those who are compelled to come to Jerusalem on matters of grave interest, or those who live in the town, go up to the Temple. Thus the courts and porches, although not deserted, are much less crowded, and they look larger and more sacred, as they are not so noisy. Also money-changers and vendors of doves and other animals are less numerous, and are leaning against  the walls on the sunny side, although the sun is so faint that it pierces its way through the grey clouds with difficulty. After praying in the Court of Israel, Jesus retraces His steps and leans against a column watching… and being watched. 3 He sees a man and a woman, who must be coming back from the Court of Israel, and although they are not weeping, their countenances are more dejected than if they were shedding tears. The man is trying to console the woman, but one can see that he is deeply grieved, too. Jesus moves away from the column and goes towards them. « What is ailing you?» He asks them compassionately. The man looks at Him, quite amazed at His concern. Perhaps he also thinks that He is indelicate. But Jesus looks at him so kindly, that he is disarmed. But before expressing the reason for his grief, he asks: « How come a rabbi takes an interest in the sorrow of a simple believer?» « Because the rabbi is your brother, man. Your brother in the Lord, and he loves you as is prescribed by the commandment.» « Your brother! I am a poor tiller of the Sharon plain, near Dora. You are a rabbi.» « Rabbis have sorrows like everybody else. I know what sorrow is like and I would like to comfort you.» The woman lifts her veil a little to look at Jesus and she whispers to her husband: « Tell Him. He may be able to help us… » « Rabbi, we had a daughter, we have a daughter. We still have her… We married her with decorum to a young man, recommended to us as a good husband by a common friend. They have been married six years and have had two children. Two only… because later their love passed off… so much so, that her husband now wants to divorce her. Our daughter weeps and is wasting away with grief, that is why we said that we still have her: she will die brokenhearted before long. We have tried everything to persuade her husband. And we have prayed the Most High so much… But neither of them has listened to us… We came here on pilgrimage just for that and we have been here for a full month. We have come to the Temple every day: I to my place, my wife to hers… This morning a servant of my daughter brought us the news that her husband has gone to Caesarea to send her a writ of divorce from there. And that is the answer that our prayers have received… » « Don't say that, James » implores the wife in a whisper. And she adds with a sigh: « The Rabbi will curse us as if we were blasphemers… and God will punish us. It is our sorrow. It comes from God… and if He has struck us, it means that we deserved it.» 4 « No, woman. I will not curse you. And God will not punish you. I tell you. As I tell you that it is not God Who gives you this sorrow, but man. And God allows it to test you and your daughter's husband. Do not lose your faith and the Lord will hear you.» « It is late. Our daughter has been repudiated and dishonoured by now and she will die… » says the man. « It is never too late for the Most High. In a moment and because of a persistent prayer, He can change the course of events. Between the cup and the lips there is still time for death to thrust its dagger in and thus prevent him, who was taking the cup to his lips, from drinking of it. And that through the intervention of God. I am telling you. Go back to your places of prayer and persist today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, and if you can have faith you will see the miracle.» « Rabbi, You want to comfort us… but just now… It is not possible, as You know, to make void the writ, once it has been handed to the repudiated woman » says the man insisting. « I tell you to have faith. It is true it cannot be made void. But do you know whether your daughter has received it?» « There is not a great distance from Dora to Caesarea. While the servant was coming here, Jacob has certainly gone back home and driven out Mary.» « There is not a great distance. But are you sure that he has covered it? Can a will superior to man's not have stopped a man, if Joshua, with the help of God, stopped the sun? Is your insistent confident prayer made for a good purpose not a holy will opposed to the evil will of man? And will God not help you in stopping the foolish man on his way, since you are asking for a good thing of Him, Who is your Father? Has He not perhaps already helped you? And even if the man should still persist in going on, would he succeed, if you persist in 503. The Parable of the Unscrupulous Judge. 340 asking the Father for something that is just? I tell you: go and pray today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow and you will see the miracle.» « Oh! let us go, James! The Rabbi knows. If He tells us to go and pray it means that He knows that it is the right thing. Have faith, my spouse. I feel a great peace, a strong hope rise in me where I had so much sorrow before. May God reward You, Rabbi, since You are good and may He listen to You. Pray for us, too. Come, James, come » and she succeeds in convincing her husband, who follows her after greeting Jesus with the usual Hebrew salutation: « Peace be with You », to which Jesus replies with the same formula. « Why did You not tell them who You are? They would have prayed with more peace » say the apostles, and Philip adds: « I will go and tell them.» But Jesus holds him back saying: « I do not want that. He would in fact have prayed with peace, but with less value and less merit. As it is, their faith is perfect and will be rewarded.» « Really?» « Do you expect Me to lie deceiving two unhappy people?» 5 He looks at the people who have gathered near Him, about one hundred of them, and He says: « Listen to this parable that will explain to you the value of a constant prayer. You know what Deuteronomy says speaking of judges and magistrates. They should be just and merciful listening with impartiality to those who have recourse to them, always judging as if the case that they have to judge were a personal case of their own, without taking into account gifts or threats, without being partial to guilty friends and severe with those who are at variance with the judge's friends. But if the words of the Law are just, men are not as just neither do they obey the Law. Thus we see that human justice is often imperfect, because rare are the judges who know how to keep free from corruption, and are merciful and patient both with the rich and the poor, with widows and orphans, as with those who are not so. In a town there was a judge who was very unworthy of his office, that he had obtained through powerful relatives. He was most unfair in judging, as he was always inclined to say that the rich and mighty ones, or those recommended by rich and powerful people, or those who bribed him with rich gifts were right. He did not fear God and he derided the complaints of poor and weak people, because they were lonely and without strong supporters. When he did not want to listen to a man who had such evident reasons to prevail over some rich person that he could in no way decide against him, he had him driven away from his presence threatening to put him in prison. And most people suffered his violence withdrawing as if they had been defeated, and resigned to defeat even before the case was debated. But in that town there was also a widow with many children, and she was entitled to receive a large sum of money from a mighty man for works done by her dead husband for the rich man. Urged by need and motherly love she had tried to obtain from the rich man the sum of money which would enable her to feed her children and clothe them in the oncoming winter. But when all her requests and entreaties to the rich man became vain, she applied to the judge. The judge was a friend of the rich man who had said to him: “If you admit that I am right, one third of the amount will be yours”. So he turned a deaf ear to the words of the widow who begged him saying: “Do me justice against my opponent. You know that I am in need. Everybody can tell you that I am entitled to that amount”. He did not listen to her and had her expelled by his assistants. But the woman went back once, twice, ten times, in the morning, at the sixth, at the ninth hour, in the evening, without ever tiring. And she would follow him in the streets shouting: “Do me justice. My children are hungry and cold. And I have no money to buy bread and clothes for them”. She waited for him at the door of his house when he went home to sit at the table with his children. And the cries of the widow: “Do me justice against my opponent, because my children and I are cold and hungry” could be heard even inside the house, in the dining-room, in the bedroom, during the night, as insistent as the cry of a hoopoe: “Do me justice, if you do not want God to strike you! Do me justice. Remember that widows and orphans are sacred to God and woe to those who oppress them! Do me justice if you do not want to suffer one day what we are suffering now. The cold, the hunger we are suffering, you will find them in the next life if you do not do me justice. You mean man!” The judge feared neither God nor his neighbour. But he was tired of being continuously molested, of seeing that he had become the laughing stock of the whole town, because of the widow's persecution, and that many people blamed him. So one day he said to himself: “Although I do not fear God, or the threats 503. The Parable of the Unscrupulous Judge. 341 of the widow, or the opinion of the people, yet, to put an end to so much trouble, I will listen to the widow and do her justice by compelling the rich man to pay, providing she stops persecuting me and gets out of my way”. And he sent for the rich friend and said to him: “My friend, it is impossible for me to satisfy you. Do your duty and pay, because I cannot put up any more with being molested because of you. That is my decision”. And the rich man had to pay the sum according to justice. 6 That is the parable. It is now for you to apply it. You have heard the words of a wicked man: “I will listen to the woman to put an end to so much trouble”. And he was a wicked person. But will God, the very good Father, be inferior to the bad judge? Will He not do justice to those sons of His who invoke Him day and night? And will He keep them waiting so long for the grace that their depressed souls stop praying? I assure you: He will do them justice at once so that their souls may not lose faith. But it is also necessary to know how to pray, without tiring after the first prayers and asking for good things. And you must rely also on God saying: “But let that be done what Your Wisdom sees is more useful to us”. Have faith. Pray having faith in prayer and faith in God, your Father. And He will do you justice against those who oppress you, whether they are men or demons, diseases or other calamities. A persevering prayer opens Heaven, and faith saves the soul in whatever way the prayer is heard and answered. Let us go!» And He sets out towards the exit. He is almost outside the enclosure when raising His head to look at the few people following Him and at the many indifferent or hostile ones watching Him from afar, He exclaims sadly: « But when the Son of man comes back, will He still find faith on the Earth?» and with a sigh He envelops Himself more tightly in His mantle and strides away towards the Ophel suburb.

502. Death of Ananias.

 502. Death of Ananias. 26th September 1946. 1 « Get up and let us go. Let us go back to the river and look for a boat. Peter, go with James and get a boat that will take us near Bethabara. We shall stay for a day at Solomon's and then...» « But were we not to go to Nazareth?» « No. I made up My mind during the night. I am sorry for you. But I must go back.» « I am happy!» exclaims Marjiam. « I shall be staying longer with You!» « Yes, although, My poor child, you see very sad days with Me!» « So it is a good thing that I love to be with You. To love You. That is all I want. I do not ask for anything else.» Jesus kisses his forehead. « And are we passing through Bethabara again?» asks Matthew. « No. We shall cross the river in the boat of some fisherman.» Peter comes back with James. « No boats, Master, until this evening... And... must I tell You?» « Tell Me.» « Some people must have passed through here... And they must have paid well or uttered strong threats... I don't think that even this evening You will find a boat... They are merciless...» says Peter with a sigh. « It does not matter. Let us set forth... and the Lord will help us.» The weather is bad, it is raining. The road is muddy, along the embankment the dew of the night, plentiful near the river, increases the dampness of the rain. But they proceed just the same on the rise in the ground skirting the road, as it is not so muddy and is less exposed to the droplets of the very fine but persisting rain, being somewhat protected by a row of poplars, except when a breath of wind causes all the drops of water retained by the branches to fall suddenly. « Eh! The rainy season has come!» says Thomas philosophically lifting the hem of his garment. « It has indeed!» confirms Bartholomew with a sigh. « We shall dry ourselves somewhere. They will not be all... excited against us » says Peter. « We may still find a boat... You never know!» adds James of Alphaeus. « If we had much money we could find anything. But He did not want me to go to Jericho to sell...» says Judas of Kerioth. 502. Death of Ananias. 335 « Keep quiet, please! The Master is so depressed! Be silent!» implores John. « I will keep quiet. Nay, I can but rejoice at His order. So no one can say that those Sadducees from near Jericho were sent by me » and he looks at Peter. But Peter is engrossed in thought and he neither sees nor replies. They go on, walking in the drizzle, which is as thin as fog, in the dull day. Now and again they speak to one another. But they seem to be speaking to themselves, so much their words sound like conclusions of dialogues with invisible interlocutors. « We shall have to end up by stopping somewhere.» « All places are alike, because they come to all of them.» « If we are to be persecuted, we may as well stay in town. At least we shall not get wet.» « But what are they aiming at?» « Poor Mary! If She knew!» « Most High God, protect Your servants!» and so forth... They then join together and talk in low voices. 2 Jesus is in the front, alone... all alone until Marjiam joins Him with the Zealot. « The others have gone down to the exposed river-bed, to see if there is a boat... It would be quicker. Can we stay with You?» « Come. What were you speaking of previously?» « Of Your suffering.» « And of the hatred of men. What can we do to comfort You and repress their hatred?» asks the Zealot. « For My grief there is your love... For hatred... one can only put up with it... It is a thing that will come to an end with the life of the Earth... and this thought gives one patience and strength to bear it. Marjiam! My child! Why are you upset?» « Because this reminds me of Doras...» « You are right. It is time for Me to send you home...» « No! Jesus! No! Why do You want to punish me if I have not done anything wrong?» « I am not punishing you, I am preserving you... I do not want you to remember Doras. To which feelings does that remembrance give rise in your heart? Tell Me...» Marjiam weeps with lowered head, he then looks up and says: « You are right. My spirit is not capable of seeing and forgiving, it is not yet capable. But why are You sending me away? If You are suffering, it is all the more reasonable that I should be near You. You have always comforted me! I am no longer the foolish boy who last year used to say to You: “Don't let me see Your sorrow”. I am a man, now. Let me stay! Lord! Oh! will you tell Him, Simon!» « The Master knows what is good for us. And perhaps... He wants to entrust you with a task... I don't know... It's only a thought of mine...» « You are right. I would have let him stay and with so much joy until after the feast of the Dedication. But... But My Mother is lonely up there. The noise of hatred is so loud. She might be afraid more than is necessary. My Mother is all alone. And She certainly weeps. You will go to Her and tell Her that I send Her My love and I am waiting for Her now. After the Dedication. And you shall not say anything else, Marjiam.» « And if She asks me?» « Oh! You can avoid telling a lie saying... that the life of Her Jesus is like this sky in Ethanim: clouds and rain, at times a storm. But there are also sunny days. As yesterday, as tomorrow, perhaps. To be silent is not to lie. You will tell Her of the miracles that you have seen. That Eliza is with Me. That Ananias welcomes Me in his house as if he were My father. That at Nob I am in the house of a good Israelite. The rest... Be silent about the rest. And then you will go to Porphirea. And you will stay there until I send for you.» 3 Marjiam is weeping louder. « Why are you weeping thus? Are you not happy to go to Mary's? Yesterday you were...» says Simon. « Yes, yesterday I was, because we were all going. And I am weeping because I 502. Death of Ananias. 336 am afraid I shall not see You any more... Oh! Lord! Lord! Never again shall I be as happy as I have been these past days!» « We shall meet again, Marjiam. I promise you.» « When? Not before Passover. It's a long time!» Jesus is silent. « Do You really not want me before Passover?» Jesus throws an arm round his still slender shoulders and draws him to Himself. « Why do you wish to know the future? We are today. Tomorrow we no longer are. Man, even the richest and mightiest one, cannot add one day to his life. It is, as well as all the future, in the hands of God...» « But for Passover I have to come to the Temple. I am an Israelite. You cannot make me commit sin!» « You will not sin. And the first sin which you must promise Me not to commit is that of disobedience. You shall obey. Always. Me now, and who will speak to you in My Name later. Do you promise that? Remember that I, your Master and God, obeyed My Father and I will obey Him until the... end of My day.» Jesus is solemn in speaking these last words. Marjiam, almost fascinated, says: « I will obey. I swear it. Before You and before eternal God.» 4 There is silence. Then the Zealot asks: « Will he go by himself?» « Certainly not. With some of the disciples. We shall find more besides Isaac.» « Are You sending Isaac also to Galilee?» « Yes, and he will come back with My Mother.» They are being called from the river. The three move, cross the road and go towards the river. « Look, Master. We have found one and they do not want anything. They are the relatives of a man healed miraculously. But they are carrying sand to that village. We have to go over there on foot, and then they will take us.» « May God reward them. We shall be at Ananias' this evening.» Peter is happy and he goes back up to the road and sees that Marjiam is upset. « What is the matter with you? What have you done?» « Nothing wrong, Simon. I told him that when we arrive at the first place where there are disciples, I will send him home. And he has become sad.» « Home... Of course!... That's right... The weather...» Peter is pensive. Then he looks at Jesus, he plucks His sleeve making Him lower His head towards his mouth. He says in His ear: « Master, why are You sending him without waiting...» « Because of the season, as you said.» « Then?» « Simon, I will tell you the truth. It is better for Marjiam not to poison his heart...» « You are right, Master. To embitter one's heart... That is just what happens in the end.» He raises his voice: « The Master is quite right. You will go and... we will meet again at Passover. After all... it will not be long... Once Chislev is over... Oh! beautiful Nisan will soon be here. Of course! He is right...» Peter's voice is no longer so steady. He repeats slowly and sadly: « He is right...» and speaking to himself: « What will happen from now until Nisan?» He strikes his forehead with his hand disconsolately. 5 And they proceed in the damp day. It does not rain until, in mud up to their knees, they get in five small damp boats, overspread with sand, going downstream again. It begins to rain again, and the raindrops, hitting the calm water of the river, which reflects the sky grey with clouds, draw many circles that appear and dissolve continuously with a play of pearly facets. It looks like a deserted landscape. On the embankments, in the river villages, there is not a soul to be seen. Because of the rain houses are closed and roads desert. So that when at twilight they land where Solomon's village is, they find the road silent and empty, and they arrive at the house without being seen by anybody. They knock. They call. No reply. Only the cooing of doves, the bleating of sheep and the noise of rain. « There is nobody inside. What shall we do?» « Go to the houses in the village. To little Michael's first » orders Jesus. And while the younger apostles go away quickly, Jesus with the elder ones remains near the house watching and making comments. 502. Death of Ananias. 337 « Everything is closed... Also the gate is well tied and secured. Look! There is even a big nail. And the windows are closed as at night time. How sad! And that lamentation of sheep and doves? Will he be ill? What do You think, Master?» Jesus shakes His head. He is tired and sad... 6 The apostles come back running. Andrew is the first to arrive and while he is still a few metres away he shouts: « He is dead... Ananias is dead... We cannot go into the house because it has not yet been purified... He was buried a few hours ago. If we could have come yesterday... The woman, Michael's mother, is coming now.» « What is persecuting us?!» exclaims Bartholomew. « Poor old man! He was so happy! And so well! What happened? When was he taken ill?» They are all speaking at the same time. The woman arrives and remaining at a distance from everybody she says: « Lord, peace be with You. My house is open to You... I do not know whether... I prepared the dead man. That is why I am staying away from you. But I can show You the houses that will welcome You.» « Yes, woman. May God reward you, and those who take pity on wayfarers. But how did he die?» « Oh! I don't know. He was not ill. The day before yesterday he was all right. Yes, he was certainly well. Michael came in the morning to take his two sheep and join them to ours. That was the arrangement. And at the sixth hour I took back to him some clothes that I had washed for him. He was sitting at the table eating, perfectly sound. In the evening Michael took the sheep back to him and fetched two pitchers of water for him, and Ananias gave him two buns he had baked. Yesterday morning my son came for the sheep. Everything was closed as it is now and no one replied to the cries of the boy. He pushed the gate but he could not open it. It was locked. Michael then became frightened and he ran back to me. My husband and I with other people ran here. We opened the gate and knocked at the kitchen door... we forced the door... He was sitting near the fireplace with his head reclined on the table, the lamp was still near him, but it was out, there was a little knife at his feet with a wooden bowl half carved... That's how he died... A smile hovered on his lips... He was in peace... Oh! how his countenance had become that of a just man! He even looked more handsome... I... I had taken care of him only for a short time. But I had become fond of him... and I weep...» « He is in peace. You said that yourself. Do not weep! Where have you put him?» « We knew that You loved him so much, so we put him in the sepulchre that Levi built for himself recently. The only one, because Levi is a wealthy man. We are not. Down there, beyond the road. Now, if You wish so, we will purify everything and...» « Yes. You will take the sheep and the doves, and keep the rest for My disciples and Me. So that I may stay here occasionally. May God bless you, woman. 7 Let us go to the sepulchre.» « Do You want to raise him from the dead?» asks Thomas quite astonished. « No. It would not be a joy for him. He is happier where he is. In any case that is what he wished...» Jesus is very depressed. Everything seems to combine to increase His sadness. At the doors of their houses, some women look and greet Him making comments. The sepulchre is soon reached: a small cube built recently. Jesus prays near it. He then turns round, with tears welling in His eyes and says: « Let us go... to the houses in the village. In our little house there is no longer anyone waiting for us to bless us... O My Father! Solitude envelops Your Son, void is becoming deeper and deeper and gloomier and gloomier. Those who love Me, die, and those who hate Me, remain... O My Father! May Your will always be done and blessed!...» They go to the village and two here, three there, they enter the houses of those who have not touched the corpse, to have shelter and refreshment.